The Gut: week off

Do you know what I like about writing for this site? I like the fact that I can write about anything I want. I like the fact that I can voice my opinion and then send the link to all of my friends and they tell me how good of a writer I am. I don’t really believe that but it’s nice to hear. This weeks article is going to be a little different than the rest of what I have wrote because I have a few things that need to be said.
The first thing I would like to say is congratulations to the New York Jets for their first win of the season. They proved me wrong and blew out the Buffalo Bills 31-3. As much as I love bashing them every week I have a lot of respect for the things that Vinny Testeverde has done in his career. He is one of nine quarterbacks with over 40,000 yards passing and one of the truly classy guys left in the world of sports.
The next thing I would like to address is the up coming World Series. The New York Yankees against the Florida Marlins. I’m not going to break this series down with analysis of pitching match-ups or a position-by-position break down. Instead I’m going to talk about why sports are great and why I hate them all at the same time.
Let me first put to bed a rumor that has been circulated throughout my group of friends and that I fed by me since the beginning of time. I do not hate the Yankees. I hate Yankee fans. Yes that means you reading this article. Let me explain why. As many of you know I have a roommate named Joe. Joe is a “die hard Yankee fan” and when Aaron Boone hit his game winning homerun in the 11th inning of game seven I heard Joe scream like a little bitch with a scraped knee. Then he got on the phone and I swear I haven’t heard that many “whoooooooooooo’s” since the last time I went to Madison Square Garden to see the WWF.
So he runs down the stairs and says “Fucking Aaron Boone!!!” and he plops down on the couch next to me and says “where did he come from again?” I looked at him and said “Cincinnati, I have to go now so I can stop my friend Aaron from attempting suicide”. He then sent me messages over aim “whooooooooing” and telling me how much he loved Aaron Boone.
What is my problem with this? Where did he come from?!?!?!?! Are you serious? Come on, you all don’t have to be a sports freak like me but take a little interest in your team. Boone comes from one of baseballs greatest family’s. His dad Bob was a catcher in the majors for years and his brother Brett is the second basemen for the Mariners. Now for all you Yankee fans they are in Seattle not the Marlins who are in Florida. I know that can be confusing because they both start with the letter M so I just thought I would clarify it for you.
Why am I coming down so hard on Yankee fans you ask? Am I jealous of their tradition of excellence? Maybe. Is it because I’m still pissed off from when we traded them Robin Ventura for David Justice. No, I wish we had a smart GM who would have gotten rid of that waste of life Zeile and put Ventura at first. This would have gotten rid of Zeile and made the Mo Vaughn (shudder) trade never happen. It’s because I know too many Yankee fans that are also Lakers fans and Cowboys fans. It’s because there are too many of them who when you ask them why they are Yankees fans they say because they are the best. It’s because not enough of them say because my first real child hood memory is about watching the game with their parents… watching the ball go under Bill Buckner’s legs and jumping up and down on the bed like I did with my mom when I was 6. I don’t remember much about my dad but I do remember the phone call we had when he promised me as a life long Yankees fan that he would be a Mets fan… for me. For all of the kids 10 and under who are Yankees fans I hope the Yanks win for you guys so you can have fond memories like I do. And to all of the Yankees fans that I’m talking about, the ones who read this article and said “man he’s just jealous, Aaron Boone came from the Reds?” People like Joe who said before game 7, “we’re gonna sweep the marlins, they suck”. Kiss off. Maybe my boy Mike had the right idea last year. Maybe deep down we are all going to be Marlins fans this October. Good luck Pudge, you have always been one of my favorites and I would love to see you get that ring.

4 replies on “The Gut: week off”

That was really good Hec. I don’t care much for sports at all, but I enjoyed reading that.

That was beautiful,very eloquent and very straightforward and touching and humorous all at the same time….You’re a gem. Being your mother is a priviledge…don’t let it go to your head…..LOVE YOU….Mamacita

That was beautiful,very eloquent and very straightforward and touching and humorous all at the same time….You’re a gem. Being your mother is a priviledge…don’t let it go to your head…..LOVE YOU….Mamacita

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