Wasted Words 32

It’s hard to believe it’s been three years already. It seems like yesterday we were bringing her home from the hospital. Yet, that’s not the case. She’ll turn three years old on Thursday, September 9. As wonderful as this experience is, her turning a year older, it’s a sad experience as well. It nearly brings me to tears to look at her baby pictures and realize how much she’s grown already and how fast she’s growing. I remember first finding out that her mother was pregnant. I was so scared! I was only 21 years old and surely didn’t feel that I was ready to be a father. But, ready or not, she was coming.

September 9, 2001, was the day she was born. I was extremely nervous about being in the delivery room. Watching over dramatic births on television shows will do that to a person I suppose. It’s not quite as dramatic as they make it out to be, but it’s the greatest experience I’ve ever taken part in. You hear of a lot of guys fainting, and I have a bit of a weak stomach as well. I did well though, and really only felt light on my feet after the actual birth. I think it was more the fact of being overcome by the joy of watching my daughter being brought into the world. Yes, I cried too. It’s such an overwhelming experience to look at a human life and know that is something that you created. Ashley being born changed my life in so many ways. She has been my inspiration for all I have done in the past three years. I’ve quit smoking cigarettes. I’ve quit drinking alcohol. I look at life in a more positive light and I’m not the bitter, hate-filled person I once was. It’s all because of her. I try every day to be a better person so that I can be a good role model for my children. Something that all fathers should do.

I’ve watched her go through so many stages in life. I’ve watched her graduate from bottles of milk to eating the same food that we eat. I’ve watched her learn to crawl, walk, and talk. We’re in the process of potty training, which is a fun experience. She’s almost there! Each day brings something new for all of us and it’s the best thing in the world.

So here we are, three years later. Ashley has a new baby brother, Matthew, who she loves and takes care of as a big sister should. I look back on everything, from the time I first found out about the pregnancy, and everything that has happened up to this point. Some of it makes me happy, some of it makes me sad. Regardless, I would do it all over again in a heartbeat and I wouldn’t change a thing.

Thank you for reading. Until next time, I’m out.

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